JUST FOR FUN
I enjoy romantic nights in my candle lit spa, soaking in the hot tub, and enjoying a good bottle of wine with friends. My interests include dining out at the many eclectic and ethnic restaurants in Chicago, Blues Clubs, Jazz Clubs, Comedy Clubs, Theater & Movies, Travel, The Entertainment Arts, Road Trips, Fundraising for my favorite charities, Picnics and of course attending local BDSM Clubs and private parties.

I attend several BDSM Events every year. In the past I have attended: Beat Me in St. Louis, Black Rose, Boston Fetish Flea, Great Lakes Leather Alliance, Folsom Fringe, IML, Malicious Masquerade, Ohio Leather Fest, S.M.A.R.T. Fest, Spanksgiving, Thunder in the Mountains, TES, Tribal Fire, Vicious Valentine and others. I enjoy meeting like minded people from other parts of the country. Please feel free to introduce yourself if we should be at the same event.

Lifestyle Committment
I am the co-founder of a Chicago area BDSM Social Club called Leather SINS. Leather SINS is the Coalition Partner to the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF) for the State of Illinois and the metropolitan Chicago area. I am proud to be a Supporting Member, Fundraiser and Coalition Partner Representative to the NCSF and I highly recommend that you join and support this worthwhile foundation. NCSF can be reached at www.ncsfreedom.org

My passion lies in sharing my knowledge and experience with others in the lifestyle. I am always willing to answer questions or demonstrate and explain my techniques when asked. Since my retirement, I have begun teaching classes and giving demonstrations at various BDSM Events and local venues.

BDSM Philosophy & Goals
Domination is the desire to exert control over a consenting partner for the purpose of mutual gratification. How one expresses their Dominance is as individual as their finger prints. I feel that taking ownership of a slave or submissive, is taking the responsibility to train them, teach them and inspire them to become the slave or submissive you want them to be while letting them be the person that they really are. Also at the same time encouraging them to experience their own growth as you grow with them. A Master must allow their slave or submissive to keep their individuality, creativity and intelligence or all you end up with is a dish rag. I believe that a good Dom teaches, an excellent Dom explains, but a true Master inspires.

I train with heavy emphasis on the Mental part of Ds. The sexiest part of a woman is her mind. The foundation of Ds training for me is based on the Six Elements of Submission: 1. Obedience, 2. Discipline, 3. Sensory Control, 4. Gratitude, 5. Permission, 6. Bondage.

Do you use toys? If so, what is your favorite toy, and why?
I use a wide variety of "toys". I feel that a good Dominant should be skilled in the use of all toys so that he can meet the needs of any play partners desire. My favorite toy is the cane but my passion is with rope because it affords me the opportunity to be creative and it presents a constant changing challenge to create bondage that my play partner cannot escape from. I have perfected 12 Point Suspension and am currently working on an inversion suspension that can be done with any size person.

Do you believe in safe words and limits? What are your personal limits?
Not only do I believe in the use of a safeword, I also use a "slow down" word so that my play partner can let me now when it is getting to intense for her so that I can back off a bit so that she does not need to use a safe word and end the scene.

My personal limits are pretty basic ones: Children, Scat, Permanent Physical Harm, And Unsafe Sex (Condoms Always Used). I always discuss limits and safewords prior to a scene, and respect all hard limits.

What's your favorite target?
The Ass & Back

What percentage of your strokes are off target? HA ! (JOKE!!!!)
My slave hates when she hears me say "Oh Shit!"

What do you get the most pleasure from in a session?
When my partner goes into sub space

Are rituals part of your relationship? If so, can you tell us about some of them?
Bathing, Recital of Daily Vows, Body Inspections, Meal Service and many others.

What is the biggest benefit for you of being a dominant?
Being in a committed relationship that is built on trust, honesty and love.

Where does sex fit in with your opinions of BDSM - D/s?
If in a committed relationship it is a good way to end a great night of play and the best way to show your feelings for your partner.

Do you believe in 24/7 D/s?
To an extent

Why?
I enjoy vanilla activities as well and anything 24/7 would get very boring very fast. My partner needs to know when to be my Lady, My slave and My Slut.

To what degree is your relationship BDSM OR D/s (or both). All the time, part of the time, weekends only, etc. Please elaborate.
75% of the time, as stated above I also enjoy vanilla activities such as live theatre, blues clubs, ethnic dining, etc. Although I am always dominant and my slave is always submissive we must flow from a "public vanilla" behavior back into our Ds lifestyle accordingly.

How important is it that dominants have some sort of personal experience or perspective of what they ask of their submissive to endure/perform?
I feel they must have knowledge and be properly trained but do not necessarily have had to bottomed. I know that if I put my hand in a flame I will get burnt without actually doing it.

What is your definition of the power exchange between dom and sub?
In my opinion a power exchange must be a mutually decided upon relationship. After lengthy discussion the Dom must be willing to realize that a TOTAL Power Exchange in most cases is impossible. Your partners profession and work requirements, family, and vanilla friends come into play at times and she must be able to make decisions on her own at times.

When serious anger occurs directly related to something pertaining to your submissive, how do you feel it should be dealt with?
Depends on the individual situation. I usually wait 24 hours before giving punishment so it is done with a clear head and not out of anger. Besides… I am a sadist and enjoy watching the subs squirm for a day or two knowing what's coming. (smiles)

What does being a dominant mean to you personally?
It is who I am, I was born this way, I cannot turn it off.

What are your personal views on the dynamics of D/s? How important is negotiation for you?
Everything in life is negotiable

What are your feelings on slave contracts?
It is good to put your expectations and rules down on paper in the form of a vow or commitment but a "Slave Contract" per se is not worth the paper it is written on.

How did you enter the BDSM world? OR ... What personal experience(s) led you to the BDSM lifestyle?
I was 22 years old and was living with a girlfriend that had experience in the lifestyle. She brought me into it. That was in 1976, no clubs, no heterosexual BDSM Events and no internet. The only place to learn things was from gay leathermen and from others in the lifestyle.

What do you feel sets you and your practice/pursuit of the BDSM lifestyle apart from others?
At this point in my life, I am concentrating on sharing my knowledge with others and learning as much new technique as possible.

How would you approach (WOULD you approach...) or deal with a vanilla acquaintance who was curious about BDSM and What It Is That We Do?
I respectfully tell them the truth. I am totally "out"

Do you think long term couples should continue to adhere to limits and safewords or should they work to eliminate them?
That is a matter of personal preference. Usually when in a long term relationship, the Dominant knows the subs pain tolerance and should know how far to push and where to stop without a safeword and by then soft limits have been pushed. Hard limits should NEVER be violated unless mutually agreed upon.

How important is sceening within the parameters of your relationship?
I enjoy scenes in my private dungeon as well as my favorite club and at events.

What do you feel is the single, most important thing for any new dominant to learn (or observe, explore, share) when entering into this lifestyle? Can you give us an example of one of your first learning experiences?
Respect and observing limits. These are most important to learn, the mechanics of play should come second.

I was befriended at a very early stage when I first became aware of my dominance and got involved in the lifestyle by a gay leatherman. He taught me how to use different "toys" but most of all taught me to never pass judgment on anyone's individual kink and to be tolerant, accepting and non-judgmental.