Dear Foghorn
Leghorn:
People please!
Let's try to maintain a little decorum! There are really two answers
to this question. Yes and no.
Yes, the
sub should be gagged because there is no need to over-dramatize
the situation and send the crowd into an uproar.
No, because
the dom is torturing everyone in the club and that's his/her pleasure.
Every situation is different however and that is how it has to
be judged. Any and all good scenes also have what I like to think
of as a "ref". The
"ref" being the general attitude of the event itself.
If you are
not the focus of the gathering -- simply the side show -- keep
the noise level down. If you're the main event, let the heavens
know how well you crack. Either way, common courtesy reigns supreme
and we all need to abide by it. Because no matter how many disco
balls and lazar lights you set up, you're not the only two at
the basement-shin-ding.
My sub and
I are in a long distance relationship. I want her to sleep in
her collar and leash as it is my belief it reminds her that she
is owned. She complains that she is afraid of strangulation. I
don't think that is possible. What are your thoughts on this?
Tied and True
Dear Tied
and True:
Fear. You're
sub will always fear. In this case the fear you're imposing upon
her is potential asphyxiation or strangulation. This is something
you can not work past or make go away. The simple fact is, is
that as a dom you must assert yourself in a more effective way.
Even if
your sub gets off on fear, where is her safety? Five hundred miles
away is not close enough to guarantee a rescue or her safety if
the leash gets caught around her neck. (This means you if you
haven't guessed.)
If you and
you're sub want something to prove to yourselves that you're still
going strong then consider all your options. A simple corset or
favorite nightgown will certainly do the trick. Even the collar
alone, without the leash, would work. The creature comforts of
someone's presence is as strong or stronger and there is no fear
in the mix.
No matter
what you say your sub will retain that fear and learn to loath
the fact that you require her to wear the collar and leash.
She may even start to lie about wearing them. Cure the insecurity
together. Find a garment or toy to sleep with that will benefit,
strengthen and secure what you have.
