Dear
Aunt Agony;
There are times when my submissive and I have disagreements and sometimes we
can't reconcile our points of view. How do you suggest we maintain our power
balance in a situation such as this?
Dear Count,
Regardless of the type of relationship one enjoys, there will be times when
opinions differ. Those of us who enjoy D/s or rules-based relationships are
more fortunate than most in that there are rules structures that help us.
When looking at minor differences
of opinion, such as what to wear, what to eat etc. The rules
structure is pretty specific - In the event of a tie, the Dominant
has the deciding vote. In a relationship with 1 submissive +
1 Dominant, the outcome of these votes is pretty predictable.
With multiple submissives, things get a bit more complex. But
the basics are the same. People don’t enter into a D/s relationship
looking for a democracy – They come into it expecting to lead
or to follow.
Major differences of opinion,
such as what religion to bring up the kids, do we have the Mother
in Law put in a home…or just put down? Etc. are a different species
of disagreement. These are the “irreconcilable differences”;
the “deal breakers” that can be just too large to overcome and
as deal breakers can cause the contract between Dominant and
submissive to dissolve.
Between these two extremes
lie the differing points of view that you describe, and without
more details it’s difficult to comment. Except to offer this
comforting thought:
The whole point of a D/s
relationship is that of polar opposite equality. It’s a Yin Yang
thing. My slave and I have completely different points of view
about spanking. I don’t like having it done to Me – She doesn’t
like doing it. That’s a rather negative way of stating that I
like to spank and she likes being spanked. But it’s a perfect
example of how different points of view are not just reconcilable
within a rules based relationship – They’re an absolute requirement.
It’s also a good example
of how the art of sustaining a relationship requires looking
for areas of commonality, seeing
the positives and recognizing that it is possible that opposing
points of view can lead to great happiness.
This isn’t “doe-eyed” optimism
or “rationalization” – This is recognizing that something which
at first appears to be a paradox, can be resolved if both people look at the problem from a different angle.
If you are looking for
a physical analogy, suspension bridges are able to carry enormous
loads – Not because of brute strength – But because of finely
balanced opposing forces. You hint at it in your question, and
I hope you find it in your answer: Balance of power.
Aunt Agony,
Pontiff Extraordinaire.
Dear
Aunt Agony;
I just bought a remote control egg for my slave. The problem is every time
I turn it on the garage door opens. Help!
Dear Eggsasperated,
I’m not clear. Do you mean
every time you turn your slave on the garage door opens? If so,
then I would see it less as a problem and more of an opportunity.
Just consider it one more little “black box” that can be used
to open the garage door from a distance. Frankly, fiddling with
one of those units that attaches to the visor strikes me as far
less fun than fiddling with a slave in the car.
It also lends itself to a
little experimentation. What you don’t mention is whether turning
on the garage door opener causes her to open her legs wide. Additionally,
if she does something you particularly like does hitting the
rewind button on the VCR remote cause her to back up and do it
again?
These simple experiments
will give you the information you need to establish whether you
have a human slave … or a robot. Just for the record, no slave
I’ve known responds to the “mute” button. If it turns out that
you have a robot slave, make sure that it is properly lubricated
and put it in a closet when your are not using it. (Basically
no different than treating a human slave except I prefer to be
a little more humane with androids)
Alternatively, you may be
describing one of those remote control vibrating devices that
can be used to torment slaves. In which case, my advice is precisely
the same.
Aunt Agony.
Not even remotely interested in eggs |
