She is bored one day and decides to recreate herself into one of the most powerful personas on earth. She adds the title of Mistress in front of her name and begins the lie. Her ego fools her into believing herself and this woman jumps into displaying what she thinks a Domme is. In her quest for importance she doesn’t even recognize the difference between dominating and domineering. Neither does the submissive until his heart and soul are caught in her web of deception.

Misrepresenting domination by title and content is not a wise entrance into a new dream. But that is not enough of a beginning so the next lie is created on a vulnerable and true submissive. The woman that feels the power and ego boost when a submissive male first tells her of his yearnings to be controlled and his need to submit. The boredom with her humdrum life takes on a life of its own with every word of adoration and talk of female supremacy.

In a vanilla chat he exposes his pain and his need and the exploitation begins. Her determination to be more than she is allows her to see an opportunity to fly on his expertise. His contacts become her introduction into a world she will never fit into. His home becomes her holiday resort. Her web site becomes the vehicle to display her new image. An image that is not believable but she cannot see past her own illusions so the galleries just continue to grow and grow. There is no content that makes any sense.

This vanilla woman with absolutely no experience or knowledge takes a vulnerable submissive to slavery. How you ask, by giving him that title of course. By feeding his dream with who he wants her to be. But it is an illusion she cannot live up to. When his eyes see what his heart wants to ignore he knows he has no choice but to continue the search for the life he needs to find his true happiness. He ends the charade trying to keep both of their prides intact. She had known his dream from the beginning but only her dream was being fulfilled. One can see where the dishonesty was all along.

Dreams become nightmares and hopes become bitter disappointments as he loses his belief in dominant women.

Her control is an illusion but his submission is not. His desire to see in this woman everything she has portrayed herself to be has set him up to believe in her and to bare his vulnerabilities in ways that he has not yet been able to do.

He doesn’t understand that her orders have not been thought out and that they are in fact destructive over time. Using him for no more than foot rubs and dish washing leaves him unfulfilled and resentful which in turn fills him with guilt and a lack of belief in his submission. The harder he tries to satisfy her the less she feels the need to dominate him. Play becomes no more than conversation filled with “one day and maybes”.

She knows nothing about the psychology of domination nor does she care to learn because in fact she likes this insane idea that it is all about her! She has no understanding of the complexities of the submissive mind nor does she have any desire to show him the way to better his life in order to make her proud.

Why?

Because in fact she doesn’t even know that proper training of the submissive will in effect add to her power over him. It doesn’t really matter though for it is the easy and instant way that she is looking for.

He needs this depth, the trainings and the pride she would have in owning him. He needs her collar but he needs it to have significance and not to be made of Velcro and pretend. He needs the control and play consistency and honesty.

He doesn’t want to face the fact that he has been taken and so he tries harder and harder and becomes sadder and sadder. Yet it is his own submissive nature that causes the contradiction that war with his heart and his mind. There must be something lacking in him for her domination to be so mundane and fragmented. He feels the fool and begins to go inside of himself in denial or he rebels against all women, believing in none.

Eventually he will move on but will not find it easy to leave her clutches as she berates him for being less than he represented himself to be. He may marry but it will be in the vanilla world where he knows he settles for less than his needs but convinces himself that love will over come all and he can put his BDSM needs on the shelf and be happy enough.

It won’t work and now this self created Mistress is affecting two lives, his and his wife’s. She has killed his dream and his belief in submission and domination.

Or he will turn to domination just to have a piece of the lifestyle. Happily enough for awhile but underneath he will be burning to bend his knee. In his own way he will become the one hurting another as he now becomes a self creation. He becomes a copy of the vanilla Mistress creating illusions for a female sub that is just as authentic as he used to be.